Also titled: In Which we Move Our Bowels for an Inordinate Length of Time
- What did I eat?
- Was it the Key Lime Martini followed by the glass of wine? What was that white wine? It didn't taste like stomach acid.
- This bathroom floor is dirty.
- Was it the butternut squash soup followed by the gratin potatoes and half a steak?
- Did I eat any raw egg whites?
- Why did I order fat soup followed by fat with a side of fat?
- How long have I been in here so far? People will talk.
- Catherine's eaten out with me before. She'll cover me.
- I wish I had Tammi's hair.
- I wish I had Damon's apartment.
- I hate my shoes.
- Crap! How many people just walked in? Four shoes. Cool no pressure. Just stay quiet and wait them out.
- [courtesy flush]
- I am now eliminating food I had as a child.
- It must have been forty minutes by now.
- I bet my dessert's here.
- I hope they aren't waiting on me to start dessert.
- I bet they ate my dessert.
- Okay, I'm done.
-Okay, I'm not done.
- How stupid did I sound tonight? Where did I hear that rumor about blood in wine?
- More women! Get out of my bathroom!
- Really, I need to find some slides that don't look like Crocs.
- Okay. Now I'm done.
And, except for a stop on Highway Forty on the way home, I was done. They had started dessert, they had discussed my absence, Catherine had covered me, they were chowing down on my dessert when I got out but they had left me bites of their desserts on the corners of the plate.